In the "That's Just WRONG" Category:

I've been looking up new romance authors on the internet. Even though I've been reading romances for well over a year now, I'm still exploring new authors because there are so many, dear God. Plus, romance authors have some of the most beautifully designed websites out there (ironically, sci-fi authors, whose characters fight robots and insanely developed technology and the Singularity, often have really crappy-looking websites).

I like looking at the covers, the author's bio, and of course - their books!

Today, however, I came across an author's new book, and the book trailer explained the plot: girl tells lies, a boy gets the boot from his family and nearly dies, and years later comes back to work revenge. Oh, well, that sounds good.

AND THEN I READ THE EXCERPT.

The excerpt ... wow. The writing wasn't bad, but the plot it explained was. In the excerpt, our hero, ostracized from his family (and nursing a wicked throat wound) remarks on the cold, devious beauty of our heroine, calls her a "lying bitch," remarks upon her "calculated betrayal," and how he wants to choke her until she begs for mercy.

Our heroine? She's all of TEN YEARS OLD. Dude! Hero! Don't be talking about her pure alabaster skin and her ringlets that "saucily [frame] her face", you perv! SHE'S TEN! Has no one told you "You can't play cricket until there's grass on the pitch, old chum"?

And then there's the implications for the rest of the novel. Years later, when she's (thankfully) of marriageable age and engaged to another, he steps in with the intention of seducing her in revenge. In revenge for something she did when she was TEN. DUDE! Seriously? What is this, Atonement? She was TEN, you ASS. YOU have anger management issues, buddy!

The plot rings all kinds of creepy. But you can be sure that if I can get my hands on this novel without actually paying for it, I will definitely read it and see if it follows through on this idea, and write an hysterical review of it.

For the curious, this novel is: