May Round-Up

It's that time again, folks! Living in Canada as I do, April showers lead to May ... snowstorms. Not even kidding.

For Heroines, we got:

• 1 Shy Artist
• 1 Shy Homemaker
• 2 Shy Ruined Spinsters
  
• 1 Clumsy History Teacher
• 1 Disgraced Journalist
• 1 Scorned Wife
• 2 Obnoxious Baby Sisters

For Heroes, we got:

• 1 Formerly Adulterous Fortune Hunter
• 1 Sly Bastard
• 1 Hot Irish Ex-Con
• 1 Jaded Cartoonist
• 1 Angsty Editor
• 1 Angsty Lord
• 1 Angsty Warrior
  
• 1 Underestimated Prettyboy
• 1 Abandoned Mama's Boy

For Obstacles, We Got:

• "I just can't win - my baby brother's been stolen by an evil magic king - and not the hot David Bowie kind, either!"
• "I can't love her - I need to sell scandalous cartoons of her for money!"
• "I can't love him - he cheated on me! Not once, but like a BILLION TIMES!"
• "I can't love him - he's an ex-con!"
• "I can't love him - I'm too scarred and sexywrong!"
• "I can't love her - her dad stole my mum away!"
• "I can't love him - emotional connections give me hives!"
• "I can't love her - because I've decided to become serious. Just - because."
• "I can't love him - he's actually smart enough to put up with my crazy!"

In Miscellaneous, we got:

• 1 Evil Russian Brothel
• 3 Annoyingly Under-trained Lapdogs
• 3 Unorthodox Children
  
• 1 Pair of Velvet Manacles
• Several Re-Enacted Civil War Battles
• 1 Unintentionally (?) Pink Drawing-Room
• 1 Lost Diamond Necklace
  

*May Pick* Tempted All Night, by Liz Carlyle. A+
Winner of the Baggage-Handler Hero Award
Pros: Great characters. Complicated and well-drawn relationships. Heartbreaking backstories. Beautiful writing.
Cons: Pacing is a bit dense. That's it.

The Marriage Bed, by Laura Lee Guhrke. B+
Winner of the Devil's Advocate Medal in Lovably Flawed Characters
Pros: Character complexity. Tensely plotted drama. Sympathetic yet flawed characters.
Cons: Repetitive writing style. Awkward flashbacks. Heroine's development a little too sudden.

Too Good To Be True, by Kristan Higgins. B
Winner of the Lamest Payoff Award
Pros: Endearing heroine. Complex emotional obstacles. Lickable hero.
Cons: Annoying dog. No lickable hero POV. Cop-out ending.

Heir to Sevenwaters, by Juliet Marillier. B-
Winner of the Gold Medal in the Field of Insomnia Treatment and Research
Pros: Good worldbuilding. Unorthodox heroine.
Cons: Snail-slow boring-ass pacing. Overangsty sad-sack characters. Vague and confusing hints to previous books in the series.

Rewriting Monday, by Jodi Thomas. B-
Winner of the "Cry Me A River" Angsty Hero Award
Pros: Evocative setting. Good secondary characters. Nicely-integrated suspense plot.
Cons: Pathetic sad-sack hero. Underdeveloped heroine. Plot contrivances galore.

The Diamonds of Welbourne Manor, by Diane Gaston, Deb Marlowe, Amanda McCabe. C
Winner of the Gold Medal in Anachronistic Quirkiness
Pros: Interesting backstory. Passable writing.
Cons: Meatloaf said, "Two out of three ain't bad" - but what if those two of the three really, really suck?

*May Dud* It's In His Kiss, by Julia Quinn. C-
Winner of the Silver Medal in Anachronistic Quirkiness
Pros: Nice enough hero.
Cons: Hair-pullingly obnoxious heroine. Obviously eeeeeevil villain. Annoying secondary characters. Little to no plot.